Learning

My goal is to work on thinking before speaking or acting in rash ways. I am so glad Travis told me how he felt last night. We had a great talk and I do know that I can be awful, moody, difficult at times and I take it out on him. That is not okay ever. So, I will do better. He is my rock, my support, my love and the little disorder voice in me will sometimes say I should fight against everyone. In actuality, everyone is here to love me and support me. So I owe that to them as well.

Hrmph.

Eating wise, I think I have been doing pretty okay. I bring the same stuff to work each day, which is nice and there is usually something else here to snack on as well. It's so frustrating that my guard goes completely down when I drink. Now, obviously, I can't drink every time I want to eat, and I don't. But, those are the rare times that I do eat foods that normally terrify me (i.e. pizza, nachos, fries, breads). Almost every time I drink I want nachos, lol, it's ridiculous. But, the part that makes me angry at myself is when after I eat whatever I eat, I can be mean. It's the guilt setting in blah blah. Instead, I am going to work on rewarding, having compassion, and trying to be okay with what I just ate, because it's okay. So that's a good thing to work on. Everyday I learn something new about me, about Travis, about us and I am so thankful that we talk about things. Life will be full of crazy things and all I know is that we can get through any of it and that's pretty unique.

All in all though, I feel pretty okay. I have the next two days off with Travis and am so so excited for that. A date to Scotty Brown's on Tuesday! Eeeee! Plus, I finally get to play D&D tomorrow with everyone :)